How Do We Wake Up

 

 

 

 

“How do we wake up?” My friend asked me this very open ended question. And I gave them a comprehensive answer eventually.

(This is a first draft and subsequent versions will have relevant links to books and videos on each subject.)

First, a bit of advice. I never listen to anyone who thinks they know what everyone should be doing, if they say “this is the only way” I tend to switch off. We are all unique with unique paths so I’m not telling anyone what to do, these are recommendations not demands. Do you.

I don’t want to be a guru. I have issues! Don’t we all? I was obsessed with enlightenment and thought about the subject extremely deeply for years but as I said I have issues, one of them is obsession and another is thinking too deeply! And my friend who asked me the following question certainly doesn’t want me to be their guru. But they asked me “how do we wake up?”

A simple question. But my answer was never going to be simple. It could have been, I could have answered “there is no you and there is no me, so there is no we to wake up”. It could have been “we are all already awake, there is nothing to do and nowhere to go.” But that’s not my style and a bit of a cop out. We can ignore the illusion of reality to give short answers that sound wise but meanwhile you’re still gonna wake up with the illusion of you, me, time and space and we all have to decide how to fill the illusion of time and space (if that’s what they are.)

So I answered as honestly as I could. First I bailed, cos I think too deep and immediately thought of several conflicting answers. Then I decided that was where to begin – there are different types of waking up and there are different ways to to achieve each. Here are a few I’ve discovered and obsessed over, to varying degrees. I obsessed so you don’t have to…

_

So different types of waking up – kundalini awakening. Political awareness awakening. Health food awakening. Energy awareness awakening. Fractal multidimensional nature of reality awakening.
All of these types of awakening affect each other, and assist each other.
(Although political awareness can temporarily slow down other types of awakening if it results in depression but I think it’s a necessary step in overall spiritual growth.)
I should add “Shadow work, emotional / psychological awakening” to the list too, it might be the most important one.
_

Kundalini awakening can be inspired by tantric sex, kundalini yoga and pranayama yoga. I can recommend a good book on the subject of kundalini tantra, a great video showing a kundalini pranayama technique and/or recommend making love with someone with tantric experiences. <Dry orgasms are relatively frequent for me, but I don’t attend tantra workshops and I’m not in ‘the scene’, find it all a bit creepy to be honest. But I know I shouldn’t judge, just prefer to read books, watch Mantak Chia lectures and practice in private. Growth for me in the non judgment area needed.>

[Best book on Kundalini Tabtra I’ve read – https://www.amazon.co.uk/Bihar-School-of-Yoga-Kundalini/dp/8185787158/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1537125059&sr=8-3&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=kundalini+yoga+swami  ]

Political awareness awakening. This one’s hard cos there’s so much misinformation out there but eventually one should probably realise that most politicians are there for personal gain, most political decisions help the rich get richer and most wars are fought for profit and the reasons they give us are lies. It’s hard for me to view someone as a fully functioning human if they can’t see past the basic matrix of hypocrisy the politicians and mainstream media presents. I know reality is subjective, and it’s all perception (more on that later) and I know we shouldn’t judge. But one of my own areas to grow in is not judging people for believing politicians and newspapers. The lies have seemed so obvious for so long now it’s hard for me not to judge and get angry. I’m getting off the point.
<To what extent political awareness has anything to do with enlightenment in a broader sense is a debate you could have, but I’m inclined to agree with Michael Tsarion and Mark Passio, you cannot be compassionate and aware without sometimes experiencing righteous anger and all forms of government is a form of tyranny with an implied threat of violence>

[Tsarion on politics

Health food awakening. Pretty simple, you are what you eat. So natural and organic is ideal. But life is all about balance so I don’t judge processed food or meat eating, meat is natural and life is suffering but slaughterhouse’s cause unnecessary suffering.

Energy awareness awakening. This is on two levels, knowledge and experience. You can read about quantum physics and I have some good stuff to recommend on the subject. But I would honestly recommend playing with crystals in the bath <with or without shamanic assistance> and chi gung (also spelt Qi Gong which makes it difficult to search for sometimes). Chi gung is like a cross between Tai Chi and yoga and allows you to feel chi in and around your body. It’s basically circular movements and spiral movements with synchronized breathing. I live it and should do it every day but I am undisciplined. I’m working on that tho!

[Best chi gung vid I found online, starts with an explanation and then gives you a beautiful exercise to follow

 

Fractal multidimensional nature of reality awakening. Basically meditation on the nature of reality over time will deal with this one. And a good dose of Terrence Mckenna will deal with this one. I suspect a near death experience would too. I’ve had various glimpses of this breakdown of reality in various ways from Ayahuasca ceremonies to tantric sex dry orgasms. My clearest experience was via plant medicine but it might not have happened if I hadn’t had experiences of awakening in other ways before.

And finally – “Shadow work, emotional / psychological awakening”, as I say, it might be the most important one. This is a complex subject and although it relates to psychology it is in my opinion the most important spiritual work, and maybe the hardest and scariest. Someone can be a tantric master and an a-hole. Someone can be a vegan a-hole. Someone can be a yoga teaching a-hole. We can all be a-holes, I know I can. Shadow work and emotional growth is how to stop being an a-hole! 😂
It’s basically looking at your dark-side, your weaknesses, your fears which are generally rooted in self esteem issues and insecurities we’ve had since childhood. We usually hide these things behind a wall of either anxiety or bravado, either overtly express it with low self esteem and/or hide it behind a front of arrogance. Because when we see our insecurities and self esteem issues we find it hard to love ourselves. And when we hide from these things we defend it, defend the sadness with anger and have arguments with people we love so we don’t have to admit to ourselves how scared we are, scared that we might be lonely, scared that we might not be enough, scared that we might be judged negatively for our weaknesses and scared that those who are being judgmental might be right.
We stop being a-holes to ourselves and to others when we see these shadows, accept these shadows and LOVE OURSELVES ANYWAY. It’s like the EFT tapping techniques, “even though I am insert negative perception here I truly love and accept myself.”
For this work I would recommend Ayahuasca but at the risk of sounding like a normie or a Muggle conventional therapy helped alot, particularly hypnotherapy. And the work of Jamie Catto and Byron Katie. Again, each of these subjects I can recommend videos or books on. This last one I can recommend a Jamie Catto workshop or my hypnotherapist in Bristol, she’s awesome 😊
I have to add the Balanced View teaching, workshops and community to the list of positive influences on my awakening but the way it works cultivates a reliance on the community and the organisation that I am personally uncomfortable with and uncomfortable recommending. I say dip your toe in and use what works for you but some of my best friends are swimming in the deep end of it and seem fine ☺️

[Jamie Catto does workshops all over England, overseas and online in facing creative blocks, shadow work and relationships.

Just check out his website

http://www.jamiecatto.com/workshops/

[Byron Katie and The Work (get to the root causes of your suffering and stop believing the stories you may have told yourself, powerful stuff

http://thework.com/en/do-work

One last thing! Perception and the fractal nature of reality. The paradox of all of this is that if the nature of reality is fractal there will always be more ways to awaken, there will always be another door to go through, each answer leads to more questions. So there is “nowhere to go and nothing to do” as Balanced View might say, we’re all already awake and all is already enlightened and illuminated by our awareness.
Okay, now I’m done.
__

With minor edits that’s almost exactly what I sent to my friend. I add for the sake of humility – I don’t meditate every day, I don’t do pranyama every day, I don’t eat strictly organic, and I don’t do Chi Gung every day. If I had as much discipline as I had obsession I would probably be happier, healthier and richer. But I don’t know if I’d be having as much fun.

Bliss plus joy equals now, be love x

Advertisements

Enlightenment, conflicting desires and emotional growth

We all have conflicting desires. We all sometimes have desires or emotions that may go against our core beliefs or highest held ideals. We’re all hypocrites. At least in thought, if not in action. The sooner we accept that about ourselves and each other the sooner we can evolve as individuals and therefore as a collective.
Enlightenment is a red herring, a fake out, a wild goose to chase down a hierarchical, path that paradoxically requires you to see there is no better or worse to be better than you were. At least my perception of the general misunderstanding of the the terms enlightenment. The real work happens every day after the enlightening experiences, when you want to remember nothing matters in a universe of infinite fractals but this person right now is costing you time or money or patience. It’s emotional work, it’s learning to forgive yourself and others within this highly convincing illusion.
But we are restricted, because what I am speaking of regarding the words “enlightening” and “enlightenment” are quite different from how the words may have originally been intended by those translating Buddhist texts. I will not attempt to define “nirvana”.
But enlightenment. I can discuss some contrasting interpretations.
Whether that is an enlightened state where you understand something of the fundamental nature of reality or a state of inner peace where duality and negativity no longer register – it’s not a final destination.
The word is loaded so I replace it with a phrase – inner peace.
I would never describe myself as enlightened, far from it, I am plagued by unanswerable questions of an inquisitive mind, over-sensitivity to most of western modern culture and insecurities related to all of the above, but I have had both moments of clarity where the fractal nature of reality was made clear. And I have had periods of inner peace. They have both been followed by periods of confusion, depression or anger later down the line.
But both study and experience have reminded me of the zen phrase – “before enlightenment, chop wood and fetch water. After enlightenment, chop wood and fetch water.”
Do the work. The real work is seeing the dark things your mind does sometimes and wants sometimes and loving yourself anyway. The real work is feeling those desires but listening to your heart. And that doesn’t happen in a flash of enlightenment in a tipi or on a mountain, it takes practice. It takes facing situations that could piss you off and maintaining inner peace. It’s a process, not a destination.
I’m still learning ways in which I am and have been a hypocrite. And I’m still learning ways to love myself despite them.
Love yourself.

The Urge – Depression and Anxiety in the Face of Demonic Politics

“The urge to what, to be demonic carbon copies who work for the machine? the urge to be celebrities who hate their lives and get cosmetic surgery to be attractive until gossip mags or tabloids finally get an unflattering photo of them in tracksuits on the way to the supermarket? The urge to earn money and pay taxes to the archonic demons until the day we die? The urge to ejaculate? Which urge are we associating with these interdimensional parasites?”
Things Kev says in conversation to people that get it.

A friend read that and responded with the following questions…

“How do we defeat them? And get out own power back? And to protect ourselves? Are we multi dimensional and if so, how…”

So I responded with the following answer…

“I am a firm believer in us being multidimensional (in fact if I know anything, which I don’t, but if I knew anything I’d know everything is multidimensional including us.)
How do we defeat them? If I knew the answer to that question I’d probably either be a general in a spiritual war or a dead man! But I suspect we defeat them by achieving the most difficualt of balance – being aware of the darkness and evil they perpetuate and not getting depressed about it. When we let them dim our light they win. If we watch too many conspiracy fact documentaries and believe we have no power they win. BUT if we’re completely ignorant of their fuckry and just work and pay taxes to them without caring or knowing they win too. Finding that balance between knowing, caring and loving life anyway is the win for me I think, but it’s not one day on the winners podium, it’s a process of hurting anf healing, short moments of peace during the fuckry to prolong the longer periods of peace between the fuckry, it’s a lifetime of trying not to stay angry at tabloid newspapers and Jeremy Kyle and remembering none of the aboveare stopping you from staring at the flowers of a petal or hugging a loved one and even if they locked you up and threw away the key you still have your heart and mind and you can still meditate and love. It’s knowing your shadows, your insecurities and loving yourself anyway and it’s knowing their evil and pitying them instead of fearing them. While at the same time not giving in.
Hmmm… maybe I am a general in a spiritual war after all. Shhh… don’t tell anybody, I’m just making music and teaching kids, and nobody’s listening to me – which is probably why I’m still alive…”

 

 

Open Your Heart (lyrics) by KP Kev the Poet

 

O – pen
Open your heart

Share – love
through acts and art

Be – brave
facing your fears

But gent – ly
we’ve earned our tears

_

O – pen
Open your heart

Spread – love
through acts and art

Be – Kind
kind to yourself
while we manifest love, inner peace, security,
comfort, joy and wealth

___

There’s a thin line between confidence and arrogance, …
But their not the same, and we all need balance.

the part of me that detests arrogance, the part afraid to shine
confidence, how could they own their light when I’m afraid of mine.

There’s a thin line between low esteem and humility,
You’re not better than others but best know your ability.

I was focussed on spirit and creativity truthfully,
but a squatting poet activist had no cash security

for unborn children, now I’m trained in various ways in raising,
children which bring modest abundance for now, i a brazen

taunt from the universe, …but not truly cursed
truly blessed to learn the lesson …if you question

security’s illusion but life’s as real as you make it,
I bet life gets really real when you see your new bornnaked.

Nearly all of us sacrifice time for money, face it…
But if you sacrifice time for money, know it’s sacred.

Planning the future? I hope I’ll react intuitively
to the moment with whoever’s hanging loose with me.

And spend time and money with those who value love and magic
and would spend time and money on me ….if I didn’t have it.

_

O – pen
Open your heart

Spread – love
through acts and art

Be – Kind
kind to yourself
while we manifest love, inner peace, security,
comfort, joy and wealth

_

I am self disciplined, I don’t need the discipline of others
we have the will to work for our sisters and brothers

I am a patient man, but that took time and work.
It takes time to be seasoned, ask the chicken you jerk.

A seasoned veteran learns to resist when he sees his temperament.
To rest with my impatience sometimes takes daily efforting.

Now to rest in confidence or without anxiety at least
I want to cultivate contentment before resting in peace.

The universe told me spread love and make music.
It might not have made me rich yet but I’m happy when you choose it.

The universe said spread rainbows and cultivate… inner peace, let it emanate, let love radiate.

The universe told me spread love and make music.
It might not have made me rich yet but I’m happy when you choose it.

The universe said spread rainbows and cultivate… inner peace, let it emanate, let love radiate.
___

Even poly amoury’s no guarantee to avoid pain
or shame, …just another sacrifice for a different gain.

Some sacrifice s/exclusivity for variety but just the same –
They’ll learn we’re not responsible for another’s emotions again.

“Existence is suffering”, words of the buddha.
But don’t be restricted by fear… or “shoulda, woulda…”

When you feel that electricity plugged into infinity
(pause for violins…)
Fly like a crow and follow synchronicity.

_

O – pen
Open your heart

Spread – love
through acts and art

Be – Kind
kind to yourself
while we manifest love, inner peace, security,
comfort, joy and wealth…

O – pen
Open your heart

Share – love
through acts and art

Be – brave
facing your fears

But gent – ly
we’ve earned our tears

_

O – pen
Open your heart

Spread – love
through acts and art

Be – Kind
kind to yourself
while we manifest love, inner peace, security,
comfort, joy and wealth x2

 

All Good In the Pixie Hood – Love lessons, balance and wisdom

I had a couple of thoughts that came up in conversation an meditation recently that I felt inspired to share.

We learn lessons from the past.
I think it’s natural to be aware of our fears and it’s natural to avoid things that have hurt us in the past. BUT one of the lessons I seem to be getting repeated recently is don’t go too far the other way. Just cos you were in a long term relationship doesn’t mean you have to sleep with everybody, just cos you got hurt doesn’t mean you have to be single forever, or just cos you felt you were over sexual before doesn’t mean you have to be celibate now.
It’s all about balance.

Some of those lessons were about me, but most were observations of how others were reacting to prviopre traumas. We can over-share in order to prevent previous traumas.

My mama always said that when you’re young women want bad boys and by the time they get older they realise they’d prefer nice men. She said it to cheer me up about the girls always going for bad boys which fuelled my later self esteem issues. I think a combination of being too nice, too sweet and too romantic made me less attractive to younger women before. It didn’t help that I had low self esteem and no money! Now my self esteem is higher but still fragile, I’m earning more, and despite being a bit more cynical and aware of my depression and anxiety I think I’m still a nice guy, (we all have our bad moments) and if seems like my mum was right. But I’m not sure what I want now.
I hope that I’m still nice and maintaining balance. From one perspective Balance is a process, never finished. From perhaps a higher perspective balance is a constant, its only our limited perception that sees the need for change.

I wanted to help humanity find balance, now I want to help other sensitive, hero complex having light workers like myself see that balance is always there and if we balance within we will see balance outside.

Everything is okay. “Nothing is wrong, everything is permitted.”
We all walk unique paths. Celibacy, polyamoury, monogamy or label-less  intuitive adapting to how you feel in the moment – its all your own your path to do with as you will. Just try to avoid extremism. (And try to be honest with yourself and others to avoid pain for self or others.)

Everything in moderation, including moderation.

Even if a path leads to death it may lead to a happier reincarnation. Indeed, it’s all good in the hood. At least it’s all good in my pixie-hood.

 

 

 

Self Love and Acceptance – LYRICS

SoundCloud link!

The past is the past we ALL have SOME darkness on THAT shelf… I FULLY LOVE AND ACCEPT MYSELF.
LIKE ON THE DANCEFLOOR YOU LOVE AND ACCEPT YOURSELF…
WE FULLY LOVE AND ACCEPT OURSELVES
Even though I may have done things I judged negatively in the past, I fully love and accept myself.
Even though I may have done things others judged in the past, I fully love and accept myself.
There is no I or separation between others and self,
Or between you and destiny of comfort, love and wealth
Even though I may have done things I judged negatively in the past, I fully love and accept myself.
We can visualize going back in time to send love to our inner child
wrapped in fine Linen, whether crying or grinning…
and giving them compassion, we’re willing
To look at my past perceived losses so we’re winning.
We visualised healing any wounds our inner child perceives
Retroactive healing for any unfulfilled needs.
Wishing on a star? Wish on yourself, that’s what you are.
Mother nature made ya perfect just the way you are.
Wishing on a star? Wish on yourself, that’s what you are.
Mother nature made ya perfect just the way you are.
The past is the past we ALL have SOME darkness on THAT shelf… I FULLY LOVE AND ACCEPT MYSELF.
LIKE ON THE DANCEFLOOR  YOU  FULLY LOVE AND ACCEPT YOURSELF
WE FULLY LOVE AND ACCEPT OURSELVES!

 

The black ooze of stress and frustration you squeeze
and stretch out your shoulders is hiding a few of these

Precious gems and crystals. And when those shoulders are less tight They allow the wings to grow out in the precious rainbow light.

You are the best you that you can be.
But hold your inner child now, cos you’re family.

My inner child crying or growling,
A babe crying or a gremlin gnawing and gnashing.

Crying about not feeling heard, listened to or understood, not a word.

I almost forgot being cool was a facade
Always fragile and sensitive, never been hard.

Am I a loser? Am I a self abuser?
Am I failure? Are we all born to fail here?

If you think you are then you are…
So know you’re not, and know you’re hot.

It’s okay to feel guilty, sad, the lot.
Admit it to yourself and you’re bullet proof but shot.

You are the best you that you can be.
But hold your inner child now, cos you’re family.

The past is the past we ALL have SOME darkness on THAT shelf… I FULLY LOVE AND ACCEPT MYSELF.
LIKE ON THE DANCEFLOOR YOU FULLY LOVE AND ACCEPT YOURSELF…
WE FULLY LOVE AND ACCEPT OURSELVES
Even though I may have done things I judged negatively in the past, I fully love and accept myself.
Even though I may have done things others judged in the past, I fully love and accept myself.

Syria, Iraq, war for profit, and the Invasion of the Middle East

Politicians lie to give them an excuse to go to war, because war makes money. They lied about Iraq. They’re probably lying now.
War has ALWAYS been about money. Every time.
War makes money. Media, politicians, oil, banking and the military industrial complex all make money from sending troops to die for oil. All of the above lie to send people to war.

IMG_20180415_115856_599

 

Some people believe Trump is an activist, anti-globalist superhero who wants to “drain the swamp in Wall Street.”  People are saying things like “he’s playing the long game, it’s like chess.”
So far Trump has incited war and made money for the elite like just about every president before him (including Obama.) I’m not a Democrat either, I’m not an American and I am certainly no fan of Hillary. The good candidates for the Presidency or Prime Minister usually get no press, or negative press. The successful ones are usually corporate puppets, I will not be a puppets puppet.

I hope Trump is an amazing actor and activist playing the long chess game. But that might be stretching positive thinking to incredulous levels, I shall probably have more luck placing my hopes in other ”white hat” activists behind the scenes.

Read between the lines. The deep state is still running things, still telling the same lies, the economic hit men are either creating regime change by arming rebels or by getting the media to justify invasion on moral grounds. Iraq allegedly gassed the Kurds. Syria allegedly poisoned children. The West turns a blind eye to human rights abuses LITERALLY every day, arming and supporting abuse everywhere from Saudi Arabia to Palestine but when they want your oil, gas, opium, fresh water etc all of a sudden the leader is labelled a ‘psychotic dictator’ and we have to bomb democracy into them. What that means is we will kill women and children until we own everything, have installed a central bank, and control the natural resources. It’s sssooo formulaic it’s become easy to PREDICT!

 

IMG_20180414_192521_961

Some might say “protest”. And in a way, I agree, but only if that protest is going to educate people or cost the people you’re protesting against money. Any other form of protest is just a loud echo chamber preaching to the converted that the politicians and corporations ignore, including the mainstream media who routinely either ignore a protest or play-down the number of people who attended. Follow these facts – The biggest protest this country ever had was against the Iraq war. They ignored us and killed thousands of people. Then we had the Chilcott Inquiry that proved the protestors right, they were lying to us about the reasons for war. And all the people that lied to us are out of jail, Tony Blair was the middle East peace envoy ffs. So tell me, exactly what does protesting achieve if the biggest one ever had no effect. No, direct action that costs the people you’re protesting against works, boycott or blockade. But they don’t give a shit if ten thousand people wave placards, if it doesn’t cost them anything.

If protesting makes you feel better I understand that. It unites people face to face and people can talk about issues face to face. We all have different paths. I personally get depressed at protests now. I rant to alleviate my depression.

Some might “say stop paying tax to governments you don’t support.” But that will only work if ALOT of people did that en masse at the same time. And for alot of people to do that alot of people need too know why.
In a way I agree, and in my own way I tried that already. But I think we need to educate people first or they’ll never understand. I tried to quit paying tax in my own way. Squatted, dropped out of a “society” that supported the invasion of Iraq and the slow invasion of Palestine etc etc. I was poor, the rich got richer, and I felt like I was being laughed at for being cold and poor. Was not effective without educating people en masse about why and how they should stop paying taxes. To me it boils down to education. Most people don’t even know that the Chilcott Inquiry came to the conclusion that we were misled about the Iraq war let alone come to the realisation that we’re probably lied to about most wars and therefore it would not occur to them that our entire political system is corrupt from the top down and inside out.

IMG_20180415_070051_954

It may be a shame that so many people STILL believe mainstream media AND politicians BUT alot of people see the similarities between Iraq, which the Chilcott Inquiry concluded we were led to war under inaccurate data (alleged LIES), and the current’attacks in Syria.

Everybody thinks they’re doing the right thing, we just don’t all have all the dinformation. I don’t know if all the info I have is accurate or important, but I’ll share what I know until or unless that becomes too dangerous (or annoying), then I’ll see how brave or stubborn I am. Kind of bored of ranting about the same thing though but innocent lives are lost for money, can’t shut me up about it. Meh, zoom out enough and it’s just accelerating the reincarnation process. Hard to keep your perspective that zoomed out all the time though, if you even believe in such things.

I don’t know how or when the power of love will overtake the love of power but I still have hope.

More love, more positivity.

EDIT –

ps take a short moment to relax and remember who and what we are. Beyond that educate each other and strive to live in a way that doesn’t support these industries. The war industry fuels the oil industry which is also the plastic industry. Use less plastic (oil) and less petrol and promote sustainable solutions. Our house is buying in bulk to use less plastic and we’re gonna put sustainably sourced biodiesel in the Mrs van. But I also wanna promote hemp plastics and other sustainable industries, hemp plastic kills three birds with one stone cos hemp plastic is biodegradable so it causes less pollution, the hemp plant turns c02 into oxygen so it heals some of the pollution and it’s a replacement for the oil industry which nations kill thousands for. But first things first, relax, or we’ll be acting out of fear and anger instead of out of compassion and common sense.