More 0pen with Less Judgment

This… this has been brewing…

There, but for a lack of education in the nature of the mind, go I. We are not taught to love ourselves, in fact we are assaulted every day by advertising that preys on our insecurities. We are not even taught how to breathe properly (unless you have a yoga teacher or chi gung teacher in infancy). We are not taught how to love each other, indeed I suspect that the so-called elite are taught from a young age to have contempt for what they consider to be the lower classes (in fact we’re taught to perceive class and then taught to hate and compete with other classes rather being taught to see individuals with no defined separation). And I cannot expect everyone to be inclined to think outside the box for fear of being ostracised. So how can I blame anyone for anything?

I started 2015 with a very neutral viewpoint. After focussing on creativity and being motivated by politics for many years – pro-peace and pro-sustainable (read anti-war and anti-capitalist if you’re still running those operating systems.) This severely limited the jobs I would work in, the ways I would live and even the people I would hang out with. Certain political points of view would anger me, and I couldn’t work with people who would anger me. Then 2014 depression came and by 2015 I was numb, almost as a subconscious act of self preservation I became numb in the awareness of the alternative I can experience as extreme empathy, it hurts. I no longer had well defined political opinions or a moral stance, every question on the subject was met with – “it’s complicated”, or “I don’t wanna talk about it”. I didn’t want to be restricted anymore, but I wasn’t sure where I was willing to compromise, where I might feel I was selling out and where I might feel I was merely growing up.

I’m still not entirely sure. I am more open now. But some lines are being re-drawn (just in pencil instead of pen this time).

Somewhere mid-2015 I became less numb. Refugees. War. Racism created by fear promoted by a sensationalist media. What I perceived to be avoidable refugees running from avoidable wars for resources we shouldn’t even be using anymore because oil is unsustainable and there are lots of sustainable solutions that would cost the oil companies a fraction of their profits to implement. Why does this not happen? Because those are fractions of billions, and a corporation’s only responsibility is to make profit for the shareholders.

So… People are dying every day due to our tax money funding unnecessary wars. At one point in my life I was so emotionally and ideologically opposed to being any part of that I dropped out of society – no rent, no council tax, no bills, no JSA, no address – nada. Those lines got rubbed out and re-drawn a few times since then. I still think it’s a valid stance, but it’s not one that serves me now, not when I can see how much good I can do with money and a stable home. (And quite frankly I was sick of being cold and feeling unappreciated.)

So I had a few powerful conversations in 2015 that helped me see a new goal. Kanada of Embercombe in particular reignited a fire in me that I had allowed to dim. When I attended a talk she did as part of the talk she recited a Hopi prophecy I had heard many times before – it had inspired alot of my closest friends – but the passion and the context and the synchronicity of it in that moment made me cry and made me care again. Numbness be gone. I was strong enough for empathy again. It made me celebrate the tribe I had found when I “let go of the sides” in the rapid flow of change. It made me grateful that I had gone an unconventional route and that I had prioritised my principles, that I knew where to find spring water, that I was living where I was living at least for now, harnessing the right relationships, that I was doing things that fulfilled me creatively as they would later fulfill me financially. Some of those principles had fallen a a little by the way-side but it was enough to make me feel, yeah, I’m proud of who I am, what I do and why I do it. But if I didn’t allow mainstream society to fill me with doubt, if I didn’t allow anxiety to hold me back I could do so much more. I have big ideas. It made me cry. Tears of guilt and tears of pride, conflicting powerful emotions.

I have recently had a conversation over New Years Eve that re-clarified my political perceptions. I don’t have political ‘beliefs’ anymore, I have perceptions. Beliefs appear fixed, perceptions imply that your view is just one angle that is subject to change. I can’t blame the politicians or corporations if they have been taught since childhood by everything around them that profit is the most important thing. I will be the change, I will continue to show people that other things, intangible things; like emotions, love, respect, legendary status, hugs and good memories are important too. But I will make more profit than I did in the past so those people who only respect money will respect my opinion. And so I have the freedom and power to make positive changes in my life and others.

So… 2016. I’m gonna be more open. I’m not going to be afraid of socialising with people richer than me. They’ll finance my ingenious ideas. That’s right, I said it. I’m not gonna worry about my old activist friends judging me for wearing a suit. I look damn good in a suit. I’m not gonna be afraid of asking to get paid for what I do. I’ve done gigs for free when I had no money and lived in a warehouse with no central heating. I have nothing to prove to anybody. And if I’m ver afraid, or if I ever worry I’m not gonna judge myself for worrying. Social awkwardness happens to all of us, and bravery is not lack of fear it’s acting despite it. I’ll try to be brave.

More open, less judgment.

I will try not to judge and I will try not to blame because most of us lack an education in the nature of the mind and in the nature of reality. But I will merely try to be the change I want to see.

I AM the change I want to see. And we are the one’s we’ve been waiting for. Why would it be anyone else?

{I will also try to write things like this during the day instead of 5 in the morning so I can sleep at night and walk my talk during the day!}

 

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{I will also try to write things like this during the day instead of 5 in the morning so I can sleep at night and walk my talk in the day!}

 

Terence McKenna’s 2012 Predictions and other potential disappointments…

Terence McKenna’s 2012 Predictions and other potential disappointments…
Yeah, I was a student of the Chinese divination system the I-Ching even before I found out about Mckenna’s ‘Timewave Zero’ theory that related to the I Ching and the 2012 phenomenon. Terrence Mckenna theorised that novelty, the phenomenon of things happening that had never happened before, was increasing towards a singularity on 2012. Which all seemed like a very vague theory to me, as much as I loved and love Mckenna. How do you measure novelty? Does this include things people have never imagined before? Does this include patents pending? I dunno, I think too much for a theory that broad and unspecific to hold any weight with me. Which would sound odd to most of my mates who know that I love the I Ching, loved the 2012 theories and loved Terence Mckenna. But I am not predictable and I am rarely with the majority on anything, not even the majority of the fringe or the alternative.
How did you feel about his singularity prediction not manifesting?
That, my dear is a BIG question, especially for me. Alot of my closest friends were wrapped up in that 2012 stuff. And although I feel like consciousness evolution is always happening and I do hope that 2012 (or rather ‘these times’) is a focal point for change I did actually predict that we wouldn’t have a brain changing, life changing or world changing shift on that date.
Even before it happened I felt like consciousness evolution would be more like a slow sunrise than a light-switch getting switched on on December 21st 2012. But I was still more optimistic about the evolution of consciousness in 2012 than I am now. Unfortunately the ways that people are still fooled by mainstream media into blaming people on benefits rather than the banks and the governments does make me wonder how stupid people are. My judgmental side is coming out now. But I used to wonder how Nazi Germany managed to get most of the country behind genocide and now I understand how powerful mob mentality is, and how easily that could happen here. Beyond singularitys or psychic powers I will be amazed when the majority of the public learn to think for themselves. But I still hold hope that the internet is both a product and cause of consciousness evolution and that the next generation will have too much information too early to stand for this shit. So, only time will tell.
Don’t get me wrong, on December 21st 2012 I was in Avebury playing singing bowls and wearing purple satin robes singing positive affirmations like a card-carrying hippy. But I never believed that earth-shattering change would come on that date, I was just playing my role. I’ll try to be in a sacred space singing positive affirmations on every solstice and most equinoxes too.
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