About anger – I would like to crowdsource ideas on the nature of anger, the merits of anger and the dangers of anger (both the dangers of the expression of anger and the repression of anger) etc.
There is a cultural context and a personal context (and I want to write while I’m feeling brave enough to not to feel ashamed and feeling clear enough to express with clarity.)
The personal context is that I have avoided my own anger and other people’s, avoided my family when there was conflict, avoided jobs with people who were likely to make me angry or upset (ie most ‘mainstream’ environments), in short I have repressed anger and chronically avoided conflict. There are pluses and minuses to this because, to be fair I am highly sensitive and prone to depression so it is sometimes wise to avoid conflict.
The cultural context overlaps the personal context. In the spiritual / new age / hippy / conscious community there is, in my opinion, an unhealthy tendency to ignore the shadows and focus solely on the light. I like to say that it’s healthiest to shine a light on the shadows and watch them disappear, by ignoring them the things we repress just seem to grow bigger and have a power they don’t really have. The spiritual archetypes are Jesus and Buddha, who are known for being chilled out and forgiving, although Jesus did throw a divine wobbly when he found the money-lenders doing business in a temple and chucked their table over (there may even have been some whipping, I can’t remember Bible study that well anymore to be honest.) It’s not ‘cool’ in the spiritual community to lose your temper with anything other than government in general. I guess even the biggest hippy would accept defending your loved ones as righteous anger. To what extent is it healthy to angrily defend your pride?
It overlaps my personal context because I think I unwittingly repressed aspects of my personality in order to be accepted (it pains me to say that I did anything to be accepted, I like to rebel against even the most rebellious of tribes / subcultures / groups.) It is more complex than that though, I honestly believed that even if I was angry there would always be a healthier way of expressing that anger and that there would always be a mutually beneficial way of getting out of the situation. I felt like there should always be a peaceful way to resolve a situation. But now as much as there are potentially infinite ways to resolve a situation there are also potentially infinite situations to resolve and some of them may be most beneficial to resolve with quick, decisive wrath.
Is anger always a bad thing?